Normally I know by Saturday the week before what song is going to be featured in this series, but this week I had no idea until about 5 minutes ago. God, in His infinite goodness, allowed one of His children to remind me of this song and it now seems so obvious that I have to write about it! I also love that I always capitalize the last word of each title (to match worthy of Agape) and the way this blog works out is even cooler: the day before You, the day before God in a sense. What did we do before we found God? So as you check out this song, think about it on two levels: the day before you met God and the day before you met/will meet that special somone your heart is looking for.
Song: The Day Before You
Artist: Matthew West (though Rascal Flatts have a cover of it on their "Feels Like Today" album)
Lyrics:
I had all but given up on finding
The one that I could fall into
On the day before you
I was ready to settle for
Less than love and not much more
There was no such thing as a dream come true
Oh, but that was all the day before you
Now you're here and everything's changing
Suddenly life means so much
I can't wait to wake up tomorrow
And find out this promise is true
I will never have to go back to
The day before you
In your eyes I see forever
Makes me wish that my life never knew
The day before you
Oh, but Heaven knows those years without you
Were shaping my heart for the that day I found you
If you're the reason for all that I've been through
Then I'm thankful for the day before you
Now you're here and everything's changing
Suddenly life means so much
I can't wait to wake up tomorrow
And find out this promise is true
I will never have to go back to
The day before you
Was the last day that I ever needed alone
And I'm never going back
No I'm never going back
Now you're here and everything's changing
Suddenly life means so much
I can't wait to wake up tomorrow
And find out this promise is true
No I'm never going back
I will never have to go back to
The day before you
I first fell in love with this song after I heard an interview with Matthew West on K-LOVE when he talked about this song and how he wrote it for his wife and sang it to her at their wedding. They were talking one night about how he wished that he could have known her forever, what was the point of all the days before meeting her anyway? She simply told him that they weren't ready for each other yet, God wasn't ready for them to meet. After all, if they had met even a day sooner perhaps they would have simply walked past each other, missing one another entirely. (Which is a very similar sentiment to the notions mentioned in the prayer I featured in the "gingerbread Man" blog) Its an amazing story about how the song came to be, but the song is perhaps even more amazing.
On the whole, think about the day before you knew God. Would you want to go back there? Do the days where you didn't know or realize or believe that there is a God of the Universe who loves you unconditionally sound appealing to you? Certainly not. I wouldn't go back to those days for anything. Now He is here and EVERYTHING is changing and I wake up every single day to find out His promises are true, and I never have to go back to the days before Him.
The first verse is a verse that comes straight from the heart of every man and woman searching for love - we find ourselves tired and ready to give up, to settle for less than love, to settle for less than what our hearts really want. We begin to believe that there is no fairy tale, no beautiful love story to be written about our lives, and yet how wrong we are in those beliefs. As I said earlier, God answers our prayers first with Himself, and always with Himself. We never settle with Him and He never settles on us - the love between ourselves and God is more beautiful and radiant than the greatest love story ever told.
But now "you're" here, now God is here and, God willing, someday our partner, our soulmate will be here. When the day comes everything will change, life begins to mean more than you ever thought it could. We awake to a new day and have to pinch ourselves to remember that the promise, that the love is true and it wasn't just a dream. We awake to find our reality surpasses our dreams!
Then comes Matthew West with the thought we all have, "makes me wish that my life never knew the day before you." We wish we hadn't failed, we hadn't fallen short, we hadn't sinned in the past. We wish that we could offer our everything to our soulmate (and maybe you're one of the lucky ones who hasn't had their heart broken before meeting your soulmate, all the more amazing for you) but we can't, for whatever reason. Oh, "but Heaven knows those years without you were shaping my heart for the day that I found you." We find in another someone who compliments us, whose heart fits with ours. There's a line in "La Vie Boheme" from the musical RENT that actually fits well, "life's too short babe, time is flying, I'm looking for baggage that goes with mine." Though we shouldn't really be looking for baggage, by the grace of God and His perfect timing we find someone whose "baggage", whose heart, whose hurts go with ours in such a beautiful way that it can only be described as divine! If that person is the reason for all that we've been through (though I sometimes feel like Matthew is blaming this person...), then I'm thankful for the day before you, I'm thankful for everything along the way that led me to be exactly who God wanted me to be so that I could meet and fall in love with you.
The day before You was the last day that I ever lived alone, and I'm never going back, it only gets sweeter from here on out.
Lord, help us to be thankful for the days, weeks, months and even years before we meet whomever You have chosen for us. Help keep our hearts and minds pure, not only for their sake, but for Your glory. Though we may have fallen short in the past, grant us the strength to rise to the hope that, like Your Son, we may be resurrected and sit with You one day in Heaven. AMEN.
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
Monday, August 29, 2011
gingerbread Man.
Once upon a time (yes, its story time with Amanda) my wonderful and brilliant mother told me about a gingerbread man. She told me that one of her friends read something in a book (this story is one of those that a friend of a friend of a friend told) about writing down what you want in a man and that her man was like a gingerbread man. She cut out a piece of paper and wrote down the things she wanted in a man and the cut out paper looked a bit like a gingerbread man. Some things she wrote down in permanent marker, some in pen and some in pencil - after all, some things change. However, she was limited by the space on the paper so she had to be choosy about what was truly important in her future mate.
I once read the same advice in a book called "Date or Soul Mate" by Dr. Neil Clark Warren (the founder of eHarmony.com). In the book, he provides a long list of qualities that we might look for in a mate and he instructs readers to have 10 "must-haves" and 10 "can't stands". Believe you me, making this list isn't easy. I could easily pick a hundred things that are "must haves" and even more "can't stands", but there is value in limiting your lists to 10 because it forces you to figure out what is really important AND teaches us to leave the rest to God. The items that don't make our lists then, must be left to the grace of God - He either puts them in our future mate or gives us the grace to love them anyway.
About a year ago my mom was at a garage sale and she found these cute little gingerbread man and woman, and of course, she bought them. My brother has a cute gingerbread girl who wears a little skirt and has a heart above her head (how fitting that is now!) and mine has a dapper little blue bow-tie and a blue heart above his head. Mine hangs at the door to my room and always reminds me of what is important. I've taken a few post-it notes to my gingerbread man (I feel as though I should name him...), but only one thing has been written in sharpie: CATHOLIC. To me, every other quality I desire in a man flows from his faith, flows from the Love of God that is alive in his heart.
So what do we do with these cute little gingerbread men (or women)?
We bring them to God. We ask Him to bless them, to show us what is important, what He wants for us to find in a partner. Do you know what He does with those prayers of ours? He answers them. Perhaps you won't leave the church or the chapel, gingerbread person in hand, and run into the man or woman of your dreams because that's not the way He answers. He answers first with Himself. He is the perfect answer to our heart's desires. Remember when I was talking about how easy it is to list a hundred characteristics/habits as "must-haves"? Jesus, in all His glory, has each of those hundred things I desire, which is why He must, and should always remain, the first love of our lives. He is the perfect gingerbread man. He has all of our "must-haves", even if we don't narrow the list down! When we allow Him to be the answer to our "gingerbread" prayers, anyone else is the icing on a heavenly delicious gingerbread cookie! (Anyone else hungry for Christmas cookies right about now?) He hears our prayers, but He longs for us to be satisfied with Him completely before He blesses us with another love. His love should never compete with another so we have to learn how to let His love be our everything before He can show us that there is even more to His glory!
A few years ago a good friend of mine came back from studying abroad in Rome with this prayer on a tattered piece of paper. The first time I read it (and the font was about this big) I think my heart said, "WOW! That is intense and hard to pray", but the glory and the hope it contains is unmatched by any other prayers I've ever found. Its commonly attributed to St. Anthony of Padua and it is called "God's Plan For Your Mate"
Everyone longs to give completely to someone; to have a deep soul relationship with another; to be loved thoroughly and exclusively. But God, to a Christian says, "no, not until you are satisfied and fulfilled and content with living loved by me alone. I love you, child and until you discover that only in Me is your satisfaction to be found, you will not be capable of the human-perfect relationship that I have planned for you. You will never be united with another unless you are united with Me, exclusive of any other desires or longings. I want you to stop planning, stop wishing, and allow Me to bring it to you. Just keep watching Me, expecting the greatest things; keep experiencing the satisfaction, knowing that I AM. Keep learning and listening to to the things that I tell you...you must wait.
Don't be anxious. Don't worry. Don't look at the things you think you want. You just keep looking off and away up to Me or you'll miss what I want to show you.
And then, when you're ready, I'll surprise you with love far more wonderful than any would ever dream. You see, not until you are ready and the one I have prepared for you is ready will you find each other. I am working evet at this moment to have you both ready at the same time. Until you are both satisfied exclusively with Me and the life I have prepared for you, you won't be able to experience the love that exemplifies your relationship with Me...and this is perfect.
And dear one, I want you to have this most wonderful love. I want you to see in the flesh a picture of your relationship with Me, and to enjoy materially and concretely the everlasting union of beauty and perfection and love that I offer you with Myself. I love you utterly. I am God Almighty. Believe and be satisfied."
AMEN.
I once read the same advice in a book called "Date or Soul Mate" by Dr. Neil Clark Warren (the founder of eHarmony.com). In the book, he provides a long list of qualities that we might look for in a mate and he instructs readers to have 10 "must-haves" and 10 "can't stands". Believe you me, making this list isn't easy. I could easily pick a hundred things that are "must haves" and even more "can't stands", but there is value in limiting your lists to 10 because it forces you to figure out what is really important AND teaches us to leave the rest to God. The items that don't make our lists then, must be left to the grace of God - He either puts them in our future mate or gives us the grace to love them anyway.
About a year ago my mom was at a garage sale and she found these cute little gingerbread man and woman, and of course, she bought them. My brother has a cute gingerbread girl who wears a little skirt and has a heart above her head (how fitting that is now!) and mine has a dapper little blue bow-tie and a blue heart above his head. Mine hangs at the door to my room and always reminds me of what is important. I've taken a few post-it notes to my gingerbread man (I feel as though I should name him...), but only one thing has been written in sharpie: CATHOLIC. To me, every other quality I desire in a man flows from his faith, flows from the Love of God that is alive in his heart.
So what do we do with these cute little gingerbread men (or women)?
A few years ago a good friend of mine came back from studying abroad in Rome with this prayer on a tattered piece of paper. The first time I read it (and the font was about this big) I think my heart said, "WOW! That is intense and hard to pray", but the glory and the hope it contains is unmatched by any other prayers I've ever found. Its commonly attributed to St. Anthony of Padua and it is called "God's Plan For Your Mate"
Everyone longs to give completely to someone; to have a deep soul relationship with another; to be loved thoroughly and exclusively. But God, to a Christian says, "no, not until you are satisfied and fulfilled and content with living loved by me alone. I love you, child and until you discover that only in Me is your satisfaction to be found, you will not be capable of the human-perfect relationship that I have planned for you. You will never be united with another unless you are united with Me, exclusive of any other desires or longings. I want you to stop planning, stop wishing, and allow Me to bring it to you. Just keep watching Me, expecting the greatest things; keep experiencing the satisfaction, knowing that I AM. Keep learning and listening to to the things that I tell you...you must wait.
Don't be anxious. Don't worry. Don't look at the things you think you want. You just keep looking off and away up to Me or you'll miss what I want to show you.
And then, when you're ready, I'll surprise you with love far more wonderful than any would ever dream. You see, not until you are ready and the one I have prepared for you is ready will you find each other. I am working evet at this moment to have you both ready at the same time. Until you are both satisfied exclusively with Me and the life I have prepared for you, you won't be able to experience the love that exemplifies your relationship with Me...and this is perfect.
And dear one, I want you to have this most wonderful love. I want you to see in the flesh a picture of your relationship with Me, and to enjoy materially and concretely the everlasting union of beauty and perfection and love that I offer you with Myself. I love you utterly. I am God Almighty. Believe and be satisfied."
AMEN.
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
just a Kiss
This song has been a long time coming. In fact, this song and "Not Myself" are the two reasons I started this series in the first place. However, while this song has been on my heart it just hasn't been the time to write it, there always seemed to be a song I needed to talk about more (isn't there always?) so this one has been on the back burner and I'm excited that it's finally time to share this brilliant song! Without further ado, the song of the week:
Artist: Lady Antebellum
Song: Just A Kiss
Lyrics:
Lyin' here with you so close to me
It's hard to fight these feelings when it feels so hard to breathe
Caught up in this moment
Caught up in your smile
I've never opened up to anyone
So hard to hold back when I'm holding you in my arms
We don't need to rush this
Let's just take it slow
Just a kiss on your lips in the moonlight
Just a touch of the fire burning so bright
No I don't want to mess this thing up
I don't want to push too far
Just a shot in the dark that you just might
Be the one I've been waiting for my whole life
So baby I'm alright, with just a kiss goodnight
I know that if we give this a little time
It'll only bring us closer to the love we wanna find
It's never felt so real, no it's never felt so right
Just a kiss on your lips in the moonlight
Just a touch of the fire burning so bright
And I don't want to mess this thing up
I don't want to push too far
Just a shot in the dark that you just might
Be the one I've been waiting for my whole life
So baby I'm alright, with just a kiss goodnight
No I don't want to say goodnight
I know it's time to leave, but you'll be in my dreams
Tonight
Tonight
Tonight
Just a kiss on your lips in the moonlight
Just a touch of the fire burning so bright
No I don't want to mess this thing up
I don't want to push too far
Just a shot in the dark that you just might
Be the one I've been waiting for my whole life
So baby I'm alright, oh, let's do this right, with just a kiss goodnight
With a kiss goodnight
Kiss goodnight
This, to me, is one of those songs I could listen to on repeat all day and not be sick of it (in fact, that's already happened a few times!). This song speaks so eloquently to that rush of emotions we tend to experience at the beginning of a budding new relationship. Its fun to be a part of something new, something full of promise and hope and better days and good things all around. The butterflies flap their wings crazily in our stomachs as our hearts leap for joy at the wonder that lies before us in a new relationship. But this song doesn't stop there, it goes on to advocate for taking things slow and there can't be too much said about that! We often want to rush into a relationship instead of taking time to let God slowly build up the relationship that He is calling us to. Erich Segal once said, "true love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked." We are all too often looking for the "firework" moments, when sparks fly (thank you Taylor Swift) and fail to appreciate the little things, the small tokens of affection. Then, as the relationship progresses we grow bored because the firework moments fade. But if we start slow then we appreciate one another all the more as the relationship progresses.
Hillary Scott starts out by singing about how hard it is to hold back those feelings, how hard it can be to guard our hearts, especially in the beginning of a new relationship. We get caught up in the moment, caught up in the sweetness of it all. Someone once told me, if you are going to be with this person forever (and its my belief that if you are dating or courting that you are looking towards Sacramental marriage, not just the dating game) then why rush? You have the rest of your lives together, take it slow. In fact, that's exactly what the song says, "we don't need to rush this, let's just take it slow." I also love that this song is a bit of a duet with Charles Kelley singing about how he's never opened up before and its hard to hold back with this woman in his arms. Now, I'm not a guy so I can't really speak for men, but for women it can be so hard to hold back, but it is so important to guard our hearts. Why? Scripture tell us, "with all vigilance guard your heart, for in it are the sources of life" (Proverbs 4:23). What are the sources of life? God Himself, guard God who seeks to make His dwelling place in your heart.
And then comes the chorus, and it packs a good punch or two! (And if you listen to the song, the music just explodes at the chorus, which is awesome!) Just a kiss. Let me say that again, just a kiss, nothing more. The "just" is not something unimportant as if the kiss doesn't matter, but the "just" here makes the kiss more meaningful because that is all there is. Just a kiss on your lips in the moonlight, just a touch of the fire burning so bright. If we want to keep that fire burning brightly we sit by it to warm ourselves, we don't throw ourselves (or our significant other) head first into the fire, that's not loving. We simply warm ourselves by it, for it we throw ourselves at it then the fire will eventually die with us on top of it. We don't want to mess this up, we don't want to go too far, so let's not throw ourselves or our significant other into the fire. Guard each others hearts. Guard the God in the other person's heart. Learn to be alright with a kiss goodnight, knowing that you are protecting each other's hearts.
The next two lines are my favorite in the whole song, "I know that if we give it a little time it'll only bring us closer to the love we want to find." Utter and complete genius...and so difficult to live out, which just makes the truth in these lines that much more important. Its not easy to guard our hearts, its not easy to take it slow, especially when it seems that everyone and everything around us is telling us to go, life is short, life fast. But, if we give it a little time, if we let God work through our hearts, it only brings us closer to the Love we want to find. No, that Love isn't a typo. If we take our time, the new relationship can (and really should) bring us closer to the Love (God) we want to find. True, it will also bring us closer to each other, but more impotantly it should bring us closer to God.
No, we don't want to say goodnight. We don't want to say goodbye, we want to spend hours upon hours with our new "flame"...or as Fr. Chris used to say in college "sweet babboo". Its new, its exciting and we don't want to leave, but leaving helps guard our hearts as well. We know its time to leave, but that person will be in our dreams (and our prayers!). John Eldredge writes, "There is a rhythm to life together. We first go to God, alone, so that we have something to bring back to the community." If a couple doesn't find their strength first from God then they are doomed from the beginning - God must fill our hearts and from that overflow of His love we love others.
Lord, may You fill our hearts with Your love, may you grant us patience and a calm heart as we seek to know and love You more. AMEN.
Artist: Lady Antebellum
Song: Just A Kiss
Lyrics:
Lyin' here with you so close to me
It's hard to fight these feelings when it feels so hard to breathe
Caught up in this moment
Caught up in your smile
I've never opened up to anyone
So hard to hold back when I'm holding you in my arms
We don't need to rush this
Let's just take it slow
Just a kiss on your lips in the moonlight
Just a touch of the fire burning so bright
No I don't want to mess this thing up
I don't want to push too far
Just a shot in the dark that you just might
Be the one I've been waiting for my whole life
So baby I'm alright, with just a kiss goodnight
I know that if we give this a little time
It'll only bring us closer to the love we wanna find
It's never felt so real, no it's never felt so right
Just a kiss on your lips in the moonlight
Just a touch of the fire burning so bright
And I don't want to mess this thing up
I don't want to push too far
Just a shot in the dark that you just might
Be the one I've been waiting for my whole life
So baby I'm alright, with just a kiss goodnight
No I don't want to say goodnight
I know it's time to leave, but you'll be in my dreams
Tonight
Tonight
Tonight
Just a kiss on your lips in the moonlight
Just a touch of the fire burning so bright
No I don't want to mess this thing up
I don't want to push too far
Just a shot in the dark that you just might
Be the one I've been waiting for my whole life
So baby I'm alright, oh, let's do this right, with just a kiss goodnight
With a kiss goodnight
Kiss goodnight
This, to me, is one of those songs I could listen to on repeat all day and not be sick of it (in fact, that's already happened a few times!). This song speaks so eloquently to that rush of emotions we tend to experience at the beginning of a budding new relationship. Its fun to be a part of something new, something full of promise and hope and better days and good things all around. The butterflies flap their wings crazily in our stomachs as our hearts leap for joy at the wonder that lies before us in a new relationship. But this song doesn't stop there, it goes on to advocate for taking things slow and there can't be too much said about that! We often want to rush into a relationship instead of taking time to let God slowly build up the relationship that He is calling us to. Erich Segal once said, "true love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked." We are all too often looking for the "firework" moments, when sparks fly (thank you Taylor Swift) and fail to appreciate the little things, the small tokens of affection. Then, as the relationship progresses we grow bored because the firework moments fade. But if we start slow then we appreciate one another all the more as the relationship progresses.
Hillary Scott starts out by singing about how hard it is to hold back those feelings, how hard it can be to guard our hearts, especially in the beginning of a new relationship. We get caught up in the moment, caught up in the sweetness of it all. Someone once told me, if you are going to be with this person forever (and its my belief that if you are dating or courting that you are looking towards Sacramental marriage, not just the dating game) then why rush? You have the rest of your lives together, take it slow. In fact, that's exactly what the song says, "we don't need to rush this, let's just take it slow." I also love that this song is a bit of a duet with Charles Kelley singing about how he's never opened up before and its hard to hold back with this woman in his arms. Now, I'm not a guy so I can't really speak for men, but for women it can be so hard to hold back, but it is so important to guard our hearts. Why? Scripture tell us, "with all vigilance guard your heart, for in it are the sources of life" (Proverbs 4:23). What are the sources of life? God Himself, guard God who seeks to make His dwelling place in your heart.
And then comes the chorus, and it packs a good punch or two! (And if you listen to the song, the music just explodes at the chorus, which is awesome!) Just a kiss. Let me say that again, just a kiss, nothing more. The "just" is not something unimportant as if the kiss doesn't matter, but the "just" here makes the kiss more meaningful because that is all there is. Just a kiss on your lips in the moonlight, just a touch of the fire burning so bright. If we want to keep that fire burning brightly we sit by it to warm ourselves, we don't throw ourselves (or our significant other) head first into the fire, that's not loving. We simply warm ourselves by it, for it we throw ourselves at it then the fire will eventually die with us on top of it. We don't want to mess this up, we don't want to go too far, so let's not throw ourselves or our significant other into the fire. Guard each others hearts. Guard the God in the other person's heart. Learn to be alright with a kiss goodnight, knowing that you are protecting each other's hearts.
The next two lines are my favorite in the whole song, "I know that if we give it a little time it'll only bring us closer to the love we want to find." Utter and complete genius...and so difficult to live out, which just makes the truth in these lines that much more important. Its not easy to guard our hearts, its not easy to take it slow, especially when it seems that everyone and everything around us is telling us to go, life is short, life fast. But, if we give it a little time, if we let God work through our hearts, it only brings us closer to the Love we want to find. No, that Love isn't a typo. If we take our time, the new relationship can (and really should) bring us closer to the Love (God) we want to find. True, it will also bring us closer to each other, but more impotantly it should bring us closer to God.
No, we don't want to say goodnight. We don't want to say goodbye, we want to spend hours upon hours with our new "flame"...or as Fr. Chris used to say in college "sweet babboo". Its new, its exciting and we don't want to leave, but leaving helps guard our hearts as well. We know its time to leave, but that person will be in our dreams (and our prayers!). John Eldredge writes, "There is a rhythm to life together. We first go to God, alone, so that we have something to bring back to the community." If a couple doesn't find their strength first from God then they are doomed from the beginning - God must fill our hearts and from that overflow of His love we love others.
Lord, may You fill our hearts with Your love, may you grant us patience and a calm heart as we seek to know and love You more. AMEN.
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
empty my Hands
I actually meant to include this in yesterday's blog and completely forgot about it until I was at Mass this morning! Yesterday I talked about how God never leaves us empty handed when we let go and cling only to Him. This great song by Tenth Avenue North totally fits that bill, so I thought I would share:
I’ve got voices in my head
And they are so strong
And I’m getting sick of this
Oh Lord, how long will I be haunted by the fear that I believe?
My hands like locks on cages of these dreams I can’t set free
But if I let these dreams die
If I lay down all my wounded pride
If I let these dreams die
Will I find, that letting go lets me come alive?
So empty my hands
Fill up my heart
Capture my mind with You
Oh, empty my hands
Fill up my heart
Capture my mind with You
With You
With You, Lord
‘Cause these voices speak instead
What’s right is wrong
And I’m giving into them
Oh please Lord, how long will I be held captive by the lies that I believe?
My heart’s in constant chaos
And it keeps me so deceived
But if I let these dreams die
If I could lay down my dark desire
‘Cause if I let these dreams die
Will I find, You brought me back to life?
So empty my hands
Fill up my heart
Capture my mind with You
Oh Lord, empty my hands
Fill up my heart
Capture my mind with You
With You
‘Cause my mind is like a building burning down
I need Your grace to keep me
Well keep me from the ground
My heart is just a prisoner of war
A slave to what it wants and to what I’m fighting for
So won’t You…
So empty my hands
Fill up my heart
Capture my mind with You
Oh, empty my hands
Fill up my heart
Capture my mind with You
With You
With You
I need You now
I need You now Lord
With You
With You
I need You now Lord
So, maybe it seems a little odd that yesterday I said we wouldn't find ourselves empty handed and then today I post a song about empty hands. I don't know about you, but I'd rather have my heart full instead of my hands full. I love Tenth Avenue North, their songs are so full of wisdom and Scripture that I can't help but play them on repeat and this song is no different. So often we find ourselves fighting different voices, different opinions, and so we are called to pray that God would fill our hearts with His love, the only thing we ever need.
I think the bridge is my favorite part of this song because it speaks so honestly about how we so often feel, as though our minds are burning down, our hearts are prisoners of war and we not only desire His grace but we need His grace to keep us from the ground. We desperately need Him to empty our hands and fill our hearts with His love.
I need You now, Lord. I need You always, Lord. Empty my hands, fill up my heart. Capture my mind with You. (actually, the first few times I heard this song I thought the last couple of lines said "I need You now, I'm broken, which is just as amazing. We are broken people in need of His love) Fill my heart with Your love.
AMEN.
I’ve got voices in my head
And they are so strong
And I’m getting sick of this
Oh Lord, how long will I be haunted by the fear that I believe?
My hands like locks on cages of these dreams I can’t set free
But if I let these dreams die
If I lay down all my wounded pride
If I let these dreams die
Will I find, that letting go lets me come alive?
So empty my hands
Fill up my heart
Capture my mind with You
Oh, empty my hands
Fill up my heart
Capture my mind with You
With You
With You, Lord
‘Cause these voices speak instead
What’s right is wrong
And I’m giving into them
Oh please Lord, how long will I be held captive by the lies that I believe?
My heart’s in constant chaos
And it keeps me so deceived
But if I let these dreams die
If I could lay down my dark desire
‘Cause if I let these dreams die
Will I find, You brought me back to life?
So empty my hands
Fill up my heart
Capture my mind with You
Oh Lord, empty my hands
Fill up my heart
Capture my mind with You
With You
‘Cause my mind is like a building burning down
I need Your grace to keep me
Well keep me from the ground
My heart is just a prisoner of war
A slave to what it wants and to what I’m fighting for
So won’t You…
So empty my hands
Fill up my heart
Capture my mind with You
Oh, empty my hands
Fill up my heart
Capture my mind with You
With You
With You
I need You now
I need You now Lord
With You
With You
I need You now Lord
So, maybe it seems a little odd that yesterday I said we wouldn't find ourselves empty handed and then today I post a song about empty hands. I don't know about you, but I'd rather have my heart full instead of my hands full. I love Tenth Avenue North, their songs are so full of wisdom and Scripture that I can't help but play them on repeat and this song is no different. So often we find ourselves fighting different voices, different opinions, and so we are called to pray that God would fill our hearts with His love, the only thing we ever need.
I think the bridge is my favorite part of this song because it speaks so honestly about how we so often feel, as though our minds are burning down, our hearts are prisoners of war and we not only desire His grace but we need His grace to keep us from the ground. We desperately need Him to empty our hands and fill our hearts with His love.
I need You now, Lord. I need You always, Lord. Empty my hands, fill up my heart. Capture my mind with You. (actually, the first few times I heard this song I thought the last couple of lines said "I need You now, I'm broken, which is just as amazing. We are broken people in need of His love) Fill my heart with Your love.
AMEN.
Monday, August 22, 2011
...and letting Go.
Fair warning: this blog is going to be epic. This is one of those blogs that God has really been writing on my heart for sometime now, but in truly amazing ways this past week. Last week I blogged about holding on and how easy it is to hold on. I knew, in some sense, this blog was coming and even as I wrote last week's blog I was praying that God would show me how and why we need to let go, and let me tell you He has answered that prayer in more than one way this past week! But first, a few more words on why we hold on to things, to the past, to people: We hold on because we fear letting go. We are familiar with the past. Often I think about people who have hurt us and yet we keep hoping for a different outcome (and isn't that the definition of insanity?), but we hold on to the past because we know it, the hurts have already happened. We struggle to let go because we are afraid of more hurt, of a new hurt, of a deeper wound. So we hold on to the past, we hold on to the familiar.
But the point remains written on our hearts, we are called to let go. After all, Jesus tells Peter that, "whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven; and whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven" (Matthew 16:18). So if we hold on in this life, it will stay with us in heaven. I don't know about you, but the things I find myself holding on to aren't things I want to following me to heaven. So in praying about this blog, about why we are called to, why we need to let go, God showed me in a few tangible examples why we have to let go if we ever want to be truly happy, joyful people.
Letting go of people
As I said last week, my family and I took my baby brother (he'll always be my baby brother, I don't care that he is far taller than I am now!) to his freshman year of college. Leaving him was incredibly difficult, but it had to be done. Sure, I could have drugged him and brought him back home and convinced him to stay in Colorado, but I didn't. He would have been SO mad if I did. I had to and have to let him go so that he can grow, learn, spread his wings and fly and become the man that God created him to be. Holding on, in this case, would be selfish. Letting go means showing him love and placing my trust in God that He will lead my brother where ever his journey takes him...even if its hundreds of miles from home.
Letting go of the past version of a friend
I have a friend (and for all you smartie pants out there I have more than one friend!) who was this amazing human being. I was, for all intents and purposes, enamored by them. They meant so much to me, they gave me hope and taught me to raise my standards in life. So, its easy to see why I want to hold on to that person, to who they were for me, to what they meant in my life. But this is all in the past. The lessons this person taught me, the need to raise my standards, those things remain, but that person is gone. No, they didn't die, but they aren't that person anymore. They are unsure, they are inconsistent and I sense that instability in my soul. They are no longer good for me. I have to let go of the past, of who they used to be in order to see them for who they are now, for better or worse. Seeing them in the present allows me to pray for them more intentionally, and yet become even more aware of the fact that God is calling my heart elsewhere. Furthermore, by holding on to the way this person used to be, I'm not allowing them to change, to grow, because in my mind they are locked in this cage, this template of how they used to be. I have to let go so that I can learn to see them through God's eyes and continue to pray for them.
Letting go of past hurts
How many times a day or a week do we pray the Our Father? It becomes such an automatic thing that we often gloss over the words without realizing what we are praying. It is amazing to me how the following line always hits me upside the head when I'm hurt by friends or loved ones: "forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who have trespassed against us." Bam. God forgives us in the same way we forgive others, so if we don't forgive others, God knows it. I don't want to say that God holds out on us or that God doesn't forgive us, because He never holds out on us and He always forgives us, but when we fail to forgive others, when we fail to forgive His children we are separating ourselves from Him. Without going into all of the gory details, a few weeks ago a couple of good friends of mine put me in a really awkward and highly uncomfortable situation. The first couple of days after it was easy to be mad, to hold on to the awkwardness, to the weirdness of it all. It may have even been easy to stay mad, to cut of the friendship, cut my losses and move on with my life. But God (as He always does) called me to forgiveness. And do you want to know what He has done with that forgiveness? He's strengthened those friendships and is leading them to a place even more beautiful than before. He takes my small gift of faith (the forgiveness) and waters it with His love, blessing those relationships and bringing them to something more beautiful than words can describe. We let go and we let God wash us in His love.
What we learn from Satan
Stop freaking out. Satan is a bad dude and there's not much good to be learned from him, but Saint Irenaeus has a wonderful theory that teaches us about letting go and in that theory we learn something from Satan. Saint Irenaeus was a disciple of Polycarp, who was a disciple of Saint John, so call him a third generation Jesus freak, if you willl. Irenaeus had a theory which is commonly referred to as the "Fish hook" theory. He says that since the beginning of time (ever since the Fall from Eden) Satan held every person in his hands who had died. But then Jesus came along, and, according to the Apostle's Creed, He died and descended into hell. Irenaeus postulates that Satan let go of all of humanity who had died up to that point and reached both hands out for Jesus, the Son of God, the ultimate prize for Satan. All of humanity, then, was free to ascend and be united with the Father. However, when Satan opened his hands to gaze upon this great prize, he came up empty handed because Jesus rose from the dead and ascended into Heaven. So what does this teach us? We actually learn something from Satan, a truly valuable lesson: let go of everything you are holding on to and cling to Jesus. We hold on to so much in our lives, so much baggage and hurt and pain, but we are called to let go of that, to let those worries ascend to the Father who cares for all of our needs. But here's the amazing thing about the difference between us and Satan: we never come up empty handed for Jesus walks with us always.
Today, and everyday, may we let go of everything that keeps us from Jesus so that we may, with hungry hearts and open hands, reach for Jesus with all that we are, trusting that with Him by our sides, we shall never find ourselves empty handed. AMEN.
But the point remains written on our hearts, we are called to let go. After all, Jesus tells Peter that, "whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven; and whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven" (Matthew 16:18). So if we hold on in this life, it will stay with us in heaven. I don't know about you, but the things I find myself holding on to aren't things I want to following me to heaven. So in praying about this blog, about why we are called to, why we need to let go, God showed me in a few tangible examples why we have to let go if we ever want to be truly happy, joyful people.
Letting go of people
As I said last week, my family and I took my baby brother (he'll always be my baby brother, I don't care that he is far taller than I am now!) to his freshman year of college. Leaving him was incredibly difficult, but it had to be done. Sure, I could have drugged him and brought him back home and convinced him to stay in Colorado, but I didn't. He would have been SO mad if I did. I had to and have to let him go so that he can grow, learn, spread his wings and fly and become the man that God created him to be. Holding on, in this case, would be selfish. Letting go means showing him love and placing my trust in God that He will lead my brother where ever his journey takes him...even if its hundreds of miles from home.
Letting go of the past version of a friend
I have a friend (and for all you smartie pants out there I have more than one friend!) who was this amazing human being. I was, for all intents and purposes, enamored by them. They meant so much to me, they gave me hope and taught me to raise my standards in life. So, its easy to see why I want to hold on to that person, to who they were for me, to what they meant in my life. But this is all in the past. The lessons this person taught me, the need to raise my standards, those things remain, but that person is gone. No, they didn't die, but they aren't that person anymore. They are unsure, they are inconsistent and I sense that instability in my soul. They are no longer good for me. I have to let go of the past, of who they used to be in order to see them for who they are now, for better or worse. Seeing them in the present allows me to pray for them more intentionally, and yet become even more aware of the fact that God is calling my heart elsewhere. Furthermore, by holding on to the way this person used to be, I'm not allowing them to change, to grow, because in my mind they are locked in this cage, this template of how they used to be. I have to let go so that I can learn to see them through God's eyes and continue to pray for them.
Letting go of past hurts
How many times a day or a week do we pray the Our Father? It becomes such an automatic thing that we often gloss over the words without realizing what we are praying. It is amazing to me how the following line always hits me upside the head when I'm hurt by friends or loved ones: "forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who have trespassed against us." Bam. God forgives us in the same way we forgive others, so if we don't forgive others, God knows it. I don't want to say that God holds out on us or that God doesn't forgive us, because He never holds out on us and He always forgives us, but when we fail to forgive others, when we fail to forgive His children we are separating ourselves from Him. Without going into all of the gory details, a few weeks ago a couple of good friends of mine put me in a really awkward and highly uncomfortable situation. The first couple of days after it was easy to be mad, to hold on to the awkwardness, to the weirdness of it all. It may have even been easy to stay mad, to cut of the friendship, cut my losses and move on with my life. But God (as He always does) called me to forgiveness. And do you want to know what He has done with that forgiveness? He's strengthened those friendships and is leading them to a place even more beautiful than before. He takes my small gift of faith (the forgiveness) and waters it with His love, blessing those relationships and bringing them to something more beautiful than words can describe. We let go and we let God wash us in His love.
What we learn from Satan
Stop freaking out. Satan is a bad dude and there's not much good to be learned from him, but Saint Irenaeus has a wonderful theory that teaches us about letting go and in that theory we learn something from Satan. Saint Irenaeus was a disciple of Polycarp, who was a disciple of Saint John, so call him a third generation Jesus freak, if you willl. Irenaeus had a theory which is commonly referred to as the "Fish hook" theory. He says that since the beginning of time (ever since the Fall from Eden) Satan held every person in his hands who had died. But then Jesus came along, and, according to the Apostle's Creed, He died and descended into hell. Irenaeus postulates that Satan let go of all of humanity who had died up to that point and reached both hands out for Jesus, the Son of God, the ultimate prize for Satan. All of humanity, then, was free to ascend and be united with the Father. However, when Satan opened his hands to gaze upon this great prize, he came up empty handed because Jesus rose from the dead and ascended into Heaven. So what does this teach us? We actually learn something from Satan, a truly valuable lesson: let go of everything you are holding on to and cling to Jesus. We hold on to so much in our lives, so much baggage and hurt and pain, but we are called to let go of that, to let those worries ascend to the Father who cares for all of our needs. But here's the amazing thing about the difference between us and Satan: we never come up empty handed for Jesus walks with us always.
Today, and everyday, may we let go of everything that keeps us from Jesus so that we may, with hungry hearts and open hands, reach for Jesus with all that we are, trusting that with Him by our sides, we shall never find ourselves empty handed. AMEN.
Wednesday, August 17, 2011
easier than Love
Monday I wrote about how easy it is to hold on to things, to people, to situations. In keeping with things being "easy" (and as a little preview to my next blog...) I figured I would feature this awesome song that I kept playing over and over as I drove through Kansas on my way to Tulsa, OK to take my brother to college this past week:
Song: Easier Than Love
Arists: Switchfoot
Lyrics:
Sex is currency
She sells cars,
She sells magazines
Addictive bittersweet, clap your hands,
with the hopeless nicotines
Everyone's a lost romantic,
Since our love became a kissing show
Everyone's a Casanova,
Come and pass me the mistletoe
Everyone's been scared to death of dying here alone
She is easier than love
Is easier than life
It's easier to fake and smile and bribe
It's easier to leave
It's easier to lie
It's harder to face ourselves at night
Feeling alone,
What have we done?
What is the monster we've become?
Where is my soul?
Numb
Sex is industry,
The CEO, of corporate policy
Skin-deep ministry,
Suburban youth, hail your so-called liberty
Every advertising antic,
Our banner waves with a neon glow
War and love become pedantic,
We wage love with a mistletoe
Everyone's been scared to death of dying here alone
She is easier than love
Is easier than life
It's easier to fake and smile and bribe
It's easier to leave
It's easier to lie
It's harder to face ourselves at night
Feeling alone,
What have we done?
What is the monster we've become?
Where is my soul?
Ah, la, la, la, la,
(Yeah!)
La la la la la la la, (2x)
It's easier to love,
It's easier to love (2x)
She is easier than love,
It's easier to love
Everyone's been scared to death of,
Everyone's been scared to death of,
Everyone's been scared to death of dying here alone,
alone
Sex is easier than love,
It's easier than love,
It's easier to fake and smile and brag
It's easier to leave,
It's easier to lie,
It's harder to face ourselves at night
Feeling alone,
What have we done?
What is the monster we've become?
Where is my soul? (Where is my?)
Where is my soul?
Goodness! I listened to this song on the road and thought, "this would make a really good song of the week" and now I sit here and listen to it again and it just gets me so EXCITED! For one, this song quite literally rocks, its got a loud beat that just gets you jazzed up and makes you want to dance around like a fool. Its one of those songs that I love to listen to when driving, when I want to dance, its a song that I think would be awesome without the words. But there are words, and what wonderful words they are!
Think about it: sex is currency. Sex sells, or so the ad agencies tell us. Sex sells cars, clothing, colognes and perfumes, sex sells dating websites, TV shows, there are very few things that sex doesn't sell (watch any amount of commercials on TV and I can basically guarantee you'll see what I'm talking about). Its addictive, its bittersweet, and as the next lyric says, its hopeless.
Everyone is a lost romantic because our culture has become so sex saturated, we see it seemingly everywhere and we become acutely aware of what we don't have that everyone else seems to have. Pass the mistletoe so I can have what you have. Its ridiculous! Everyone's been scared to death of dying here alone so we throw ourselves at anyone and everyone so that, even if its only for a few hours or even minutes, we aren't alone. (How much better off would we be if we paused and threw ourselves at Jesus, for with Him we are never alone?)
The chorus. Brilliant. "She" is easier than love. She might be that drunken girl in a bar. She might be you, she might be me. She might be that cheap hook-up. She might those seductive glances flashed back and forth at a restaurant. She might be anything. But "she", whatever or whoever "she" might be is easier than love. Love is hard. Don't believe me? Look at Jesus hanging on the cross, google any image of the crucifixion and you'll see just how hard love is. How many cliches are out there about hard things, about waiting?
Good things come to those who wait.
The waiting is the hardest part.
Nothing worth having ever comes easy.
Nothing worth having ever comes without effort.
I'm sure you could think of loads more, but they are all over the place! So, do you want something easy or do you want something worthwhile?
Its easier to leave, its easier to lie, its easier to fake and smile and bribe. Isn't it though? We all know how easy it is to walk away, to get in a fight and just leave instead of working through the problem. Its easier to lie and make yourself look good rather than reveal the truth and look bad. Its easier to fake it, to smile and make believe that everything is okay. Its easy. But its harder to face ourselves at night, when the lights go down and we are left with ourselves. What have we done? What is the monster we've become? We've created an "easy" monster instead of creating love. Where is my soul? Lost in easy-land.
Then, towards the end of the song Switchfoot changes the chorus a bit, instead of "she" sex is easier than love. Sex is easier than life (and believe you me, all too often our culture believes that sex is easier than actually being open to life). Sex is easy, real love is hard. Sex (I would imagine) is easier to fake (goodness knows its all over the movies and magazines...I'm thinking of the movie "Easy A" in particular!), its easier to brag. Besides, in our culture, in our time who brags about being a virgin? Not many people I know. But I'll ask the question again, do we want something easy or do we want something worthwhile, something eternal, something safe, constant and everlasting? Something real, something true, something meaningful? I don't know about you, but I want something worthwhile, something lasting. Sex may be easy, but love is worth waiting for. What is the monster we've become? Where is my soul? Where is your soul? I pray its lost in the everlasting love of Jesus.
AMEN.
Song: Easier Than Love
Arists: Switchfoot
Lyrics:
Sex is currency
She sells cars,
She sells magazines
Addictive bittersweet, clap your hands,
with the hopeless nicotines
Everyone's a lost romantic,
Since our love became a kissing show
Everyone's a Casanova,
Come and pass me the mistletoe
Everyone's been scared to death of dying here alone
She is easier than love
Is easier than life
It's easier to fake and smile and bribe
It's easier to leave
It's easier to lie
It's harder to face ourselves at night
Feeling alone,
What have we done?
What is the monster we've become?
Where is my soul?
Numb
Sex is industry,
The CEO, of corporate policy
Skin-deep ministry,
Suburban youth, hail your so-called liberty
Every advertising antic,
Our banner waves with a neon glow
War and love become pedantic,
We wage love with a mistletoe
Everyone's been scared to death of dying here alone
She is easier than love
Is easier than life
It's easier to fake and smile and bribe
It's easier to leave
It's easier to lie
It's harder to face ourselves at night
Feeling alone,
What have we done?
What is the monster we've become?
Where is my soul?
Ah, la, la, la, la,
(Yeah!)
La la la la la la la, (2x)
It's easier to love,
It's easier to love (2x)
She is easier than love,
It's easier to love
Everyone's been scared to death of,
Everyone's been scared to death of,
Everyone's been scared to death of dying here alone,
alone
Sex is easier than love,
It's easier than love,
It's easier to fake and smile and brag
It's easier to leave,
It's easier to lie,
It's harder to face ourselves at night
Feeling alone,
What have we done?
What is the monster we've become?
Where is my soul? (Where is my?)
Where is my soul?
Goodness! I listened to this song on the road and thought, "this would make a really good song of the week" and now I sit here and listen to it again and it just gets me so EXCITED! For one, this song quite literally rocks, its got a loud beat that just gets you jazzed up and makes you want to dance around like a fool. Its one of those songs that I love to listen to when driving, when I want to dance, its a song that I think would be awesome without the words. But there are words, and what wonderful words they are!
Think about it: sex is currency. Sex sells, or so the ad agencies tell us. Sex sells cars, clothing, colognes and perfumes, sex sells dating websites, TV shows, there are very few things that sex doesn't sell (watch any amount of commercials on TV and I can basically guarantee you'll see what I'm talking about). Its addictive, its bittersweet, and as the next lyric says, its hopeless.
Everyone is a lost romantic because our culture has become so sex saturated, we see it seemingly everywhere and we become acutely aware of what we don't have that everyone else seems to have. Pass the mistletoe so I can have what you have. Its ridiculous! Everyone's been scared to death of dying here alone so we throw ourselves at anyone and everyone so that, even if its only for a few hours or even minutes, we aren't alone. (How much better off would we be if we paused and threw ourselves at Jesus, for with Him we are never alone?)
The chorus. Brilliant. "She" is easier than love. She might be that drunken girl in a bar. She might be you, she might be me. She might be that cheap hook-up. She might those seductive glances flashed back and forth at a restaurant. She might be anything. But "she", whatever or whoever "she" might be is easier than love. Love is hard. Don't believe me? Look at Jesus hanging on the cross, google any image of the crucifixion and you'll see just how hard love is. How many cliches are out there about hard things, about waiting?
Good things come to those who wait.
The waiting is the hardest part.
Nothing worth having ever comes easy.
Nothing worth having ever comes without effort.
I'm sure you could think of loads more, but they are all over the place! So, do you want something easy or do you want something worthwhile?
Its easier to leave, its easier to lie, its easier to fake and smile and bribe. Isn't it though? We all know how easy it is to walk away, to get in a fight and just leave instead of working through the problem. Its easier to lie and make yourself look good rather than reveal the truth and look bad. Its easier to fake it, to smile and make believe that everything is okay. Its easy. But its harder to face ourselves at night, when the lights go down and we are left with ourselves. What have we done? What is the monster we've become? We've created an "easy" monster instead of creating love. Where is my soul? Lost in easy-land.
Then, towards the end of the song Switchfoot changes the chorus a bit, instead of "she" sex is easier than love. Sex is easier than life (and believe you me, all too often our culture believes that sex is easier than actually being open to life). Sex is easy, real love is hard. Sex (I would imagine) is easier to fake (goodness knows its all over the movies and magazines...I'm thinking of the movie "Easy A" in particular!), its easier to brag. Besides, in our culture, in our time who brags about being a virgin? Not many people I know. But I'll ask the question again, do we want something easy or do we want something worthwhile, something eternal, something safe, constant and everlasting? Something real, something true, something meaningful? I don't know about you, but I want something worthwhile, something lasting. Sex may be easy, but love is worth waiting for. What is the monster we've become? Where is my soul? Where is your soul? I pray its lost in the everlasting love of Jesus.
AMEN.
Monday, August 15, 2011
holding On...
Before starting this week's blog, its time for a shameless plug. If you enjoy my blogs, be sure to check out http://www.thepapist.org/ (launching later this month) and "like" The Papist on facebook. The Papist features Catholic young adults blogging about all things Catholic and will feature awesome staff writers (including yours truly!) and other great contributions on Catholic life! Spread the word! Now, back to this week's regularly scheduled blog...
Recently I've been struck by how easy it is to hold on to things, to people, to situations, to memories, to how things used to be. I'm sitting here right now in hotel room in Tulsa, Oklahoma fully aware that tomorrow morning my parents and I will return to Colorado, but my brother will stay here for college. I can honestly say that we are all happy for him and excited to watch him grow and journey through college and through life, but that doesn't necessarily make the impending goodbyes any easier.
God knows its easier to hold on to the way things used to be than to realize how they really are. Take, for example, any old relationship you've been in, one that was really good, one that made you happy and hopeful, one that made you believe in happily ever afters. How hard is it to let that relationship go? Even if it ended poorly, chances are that you've looked back at least a time or two and wished that it hadn't ended, things were so good between you. Its easier to hold on, to believe that someday you'll get that back, that things will simply go back to the way they were. For that matter, its easy to believe that someday my brother will come back home and everything will simply be as it was, that college won't change him at all.
Its easy to hold on to people. It would be easy to hold on to my brother, to not let him go to college, grow up, see the world. It would be easy for me to hold on to an old boyfriend, to stalk him (easy, not necessarily legal!) and keep tabs on him where ever he went. Its easy to hold on to people, its far more difficult to let them go, to say goodbye.
Its easier to look back on some time in your life when you were really happy. For many people, that time may have been (or perhaps is) in college. College was a time when they were footloose and fancy free, they didn't really have any bills to pay, they didn't have to deal with a boss that was insane or many of life's big annoying issues. Its easy to look back on that time and want to hold on to it, to try and live that way even after they've left college (and heaven knows I'm guilty of that too!), to hold on rather than move on.
Its also easy to hold on to things. Its really not uncommon for girls to hold on to things after a relationship ends. I know more than a couple of girls who have a box or a drawer or a bag full of things from a relationship (or two or more!): movie ticket stubs, Christmas cards, CD's they made for a guy that he never got for one reason or another, pictures of the two of them, mementos of happier times. Its easy to hold on because often times we want proof that the relationship really happened, that we were once really happy. But those things that we hold on to (and I can really only speak for girls here, I have no idea if guys do this too) often keep us holding on to something that simply doesn't exist.
Holding on is easy. Letting go, well, letting go is hard, but so necessary if we ever hope to be happy again...
[to be continued next week...so hold on until then!] :)
Recently I've been struck by how easy it is to hold on to things, to people, to situations, to memories, to how things used to be. I'm sitting here right now in hotel room in Tulsa, Oklahoma fully aware that tomorrow morning my parents and I will return to Colorado, but my brother will stay here for college. I can honestly say that we are all happy for him and excited to watch him grow and journey through college and through life, but that doesn't necessarily make the impending goodbyes any easier.
God knows its easier to hold on to the way things used to be than to realize how they really are. Take, for example, any old relationship you've been in, one that was really good, one that made you happy and hopeful, one that made you believe in happily ever afters. How hard is it to let that relationship go? Even if it ended poorly, chances are that you've looked back at least a time or two and wished that it hadn't ended, things were so good between you. Its easier to hold on, to believe that someday you'll get that back, that things will simply go back to the way they were. For that matter, its easy to believe that someday my brother will come back home and everything will simply be as it was, that college won't change him at all.
Its easy to hold on to people. It would be easy to hold on to my brother, to not let him go to college, grow up, see the world. It would be easy for me to hold on to an old boyfriend, to stalk him (easy, not necessarily legal!) and keep tabs on him where ever he went. Its easy to hold on to people, its far more difficult to let them go, to say goodbye.
Its easier to look back on some time in your life when you were really happy. For many people, that time may have been (or perhaps is) in college. College was a time when they were footloose and fancy free, they didn't really have any bills to pay, they didn't have to deal with a boss that was insane or many of life's big annoying issues. Its easy to look back on that time and want to hold on to it, to try and live that way even after they've left college (and heaven knows I'm guilty of that too!), to hold on rather than move on.
Its also easy to hold on to things. Its really not uncommon for girls to hold on to things after a relationship ends. I know more than a couple of girls who have a box or a drawer or a bag full of things from a relationship (or two or more!): movie ticket stubs, Christmas cards, CD's they made for a guy that he never got for one reason or another, pictures of the two of them, mementos of happier times. Its easy to hold on because often times we want proof that the relationship really happened, that we were once really happy. But those things that we hold on to (and I can really only speak for girls here, I have no idea if guys do this too) often keep us holding on to something that simply doesn't exist.
Holding on is easy. Letting go, well, letting go is hard, but so necessary if we ever hope to be happy again...
[to be continued next week...so hold on until then!] :)
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
til kingdom Come
I forgot how much I loved this song until I rediscovered it lying in wait on my computer. What a beautiful song this is, its just relaxing to listen to, and then to find such wonder in the lyrics makes it that much more amazing! Without further ado, the song of the week:
Artist: Coldplay
Song: Til Kingdom Come
Lyrics:
Steal my heart and hold my tongue.
I feel my time, my time has come.
Let me in, unlock the door.
I've never felt this way before.
The wheels just keep on turning,
The drummer begins to drum,
I don't know which way I'm going,
I don't know which way I've come.
Hold my head inside your hands,
I need someone who understands.
I need someone, someone who hears,
For you, I've waited all these years.
For you, I'd wait 'til kingdom come.
Until my day, my day is done.
And say you'll come, and set me free,
Just say you'll wait, you'll wait for me.
In your tears and in your blood,
In your fire and in your flood,
I hear you laugh, I heard you sing,
"I wouldn't change a single thing."
The wheels just keep on turning,
The drummers begin to drum,
I don't know which way I'm going,
I don't know what I've become.
For you, I'd wait 'til kingdom come,
Until my days, my days are done.
Say you'll come and set me free,
Just say you'll wait, you'll wait for me.
Just say you'll wait, you'll wait for me.
Just say you'll wait, you'll wait for me.
Brilliant. Sometimes I feel like these songs are so amazing they don't need any explaining, besides, the lyrics mean different things to different people, which is one of my favorite things about music. And for that matter, the same is true for songs without words, they evoke different emotions in different people. So...why not explain the song, what I take it to mean? This is my blog after all :)
"Let me in, unlock the door." I think this refers to the door of our hearts, God knows we keep them under lock and key. We've been hurt and heartbroken before so we put doors and locks and brick walls up around our hearts. But when the time comes, we'll unlock the door. After all, we need someone who understands, we need someone who hears. So while you're waiting don't settle for less than that! You need someone who truly understands you, someone who hears you, not just someone who listens, but who truly hears you, who hears your heart (check out the song from last week for more on this). For a person like that, I'd wait all these years and more. That's the kind of person worth waiting for.
And then the chorus...I could listen to it all day! For you I'd wait til kingdom come, until my day, my day is done. And say you'll come and set me free, say you'll wait, you'll wait for me. For that man, whoever God has chosen for me, I'd wait until kingdom come. Then I think about that line a little deeper...that Man already exists, and I'll wait until kingdom come to see Him again in Heaven, I'll wait until my days are done. He already said He would come, and He has. He came and set me free. And oh how glorious, He waits for me, always ready to greet me with warm arms. He waits until kingdom come for me.
Actually, the next verse makes more sense when you think about it in terms of Jesus. "In Your tears and in Your blood, in Your fire, and in Your flood, I hear You laugh, I heard you sing, "I wouldn't change a single thing."" In His tears, in His blood that flowed freely as He hung on the cross, He sings that He wouldn't change a single thing. He would die for us still. Even if this verse isn't about Jesus, I'd like to think my future husband is saying that he wouldn't change a single thing. Though it may take a while for us to find each other, we won't find each other until God is ready for us to, so why would we want to change a thing about God's plan for us?
Just say You'll wait, You'll wait for me. Are you willing to wait? Seek Jesus and rest your heart in Him as you wait for whatever vocation He is calling you to.
AMEN.
Artist: Coldplay
Song: Til Kingdom Come
Lyrics:
Steal my heart and hold my tongue.
I feel my time, my time has come.
Let me in, unlock the door.
I've never felt this way before.
The wheels just keep on turning,
The drummer begins to drum,
I don't know which way I'm going,
I don't know which way I've come.
Hold my head inside your hands,
I need someone who understands.
I need someone, someone who hears,
For you, I've waited all these years.
For you, I'd wait 'til kingdom come.
Until my day, my day is done.
And say you'll come, and set me free,
Just say you'll wait, you'll wait for me.
In your tears and in your blood,
In your fire and in your flood,
I hear you laugh, I heard you sing,
"I wouldn't change a single thing."
The wheels just keep on turning,
The drummers begin to drum,
I don't know which way I'm going,
I don't know what I've become.
For you, I'd wait 'til kingdom come,
Until my days, my days are done.
Say you'll come and set me free,
Just say you'll wait, you'll wait for me.
Just say you'll wait, you'll wait for me.
Just say you'll wait, you'll wait for me.
Brilliant. Sometimes I feel like these songs are so amazing they don't need any explaining, besides, the lyrics mean different things to different people, which is one of my favorite things about music. And for that matter, the same is true for songs without words, they evoke different emotions in different people. So...why not explain the song, what I take it to mean? This is my blog after all :)
"Let me in, unlock the door." I think this refers to the door of our hearts, God knows we keep them under lock and key. We've been hurt and heartbroken before so we put doors and locks and brick walls up around our hearts. But when the time comes, we'll unlock the door. After all, we need someone who understands, we need someone who hears. So while you're waiting don't settle for less than that! You need someone who truly understands you, someone who hears you, not just someone who listens, but who truly hears you, who hears your heart (check out the song from last week for more on this). For a person like that, I'd wait all these years and more. That's the kind of person worth waiting for.
And then the chorus...I could listen to it all day! For you I'd wait til kingdom come, until my day, my day is done. And say you'll come and set me free, say you'll wait, you'll wait for me. For that man, whoever God has chosen for me, I'd wait until kingdom come. Then I think about that line a little deeper...that Man already exists, and I'll wait until kingdom come to see Him again in Heaven, I'll wait until my days are done. He already said He would come, and He has. He came and set me free. And oh how glorious, He waits for me, always ready to greet me with warm arms. He waits until kingdom come for me.
Actually, the next verse makes more sense when you think about it in terms of Jesus. "In Your tears and in Your blood, in Your fire, and in Your flood, I hear You laugh, I heard you sing, "I wouldn't change a single thing."" In His tears, in His blood that flowed freely as He hung on the cross, He sings that He wouldn't change a single thing. He would die for us still. Even if this verse isn't about Jesus, I'd like to think my future husband is saying that he wouldn't change a single thing. Though it may take a while for us to find each other, we won't find each other until God is ready for us to, so why would we want to change a thing about God's plan for us?
Just say You'll wait, You'll wait for me. Are you willing to wait? Seek Jesus and rest your heart in Him as you wait for whatever vocation He is calling you to.
AMEN.
Monday, August 8, 2011
woman Up.
Alright ladies, its our turn. Men need to be men, but women need to be women. I saw a shirt a while back that a guy was wearing and all it said was, "MAN UP." That's right, be a man (my previous blog about who men should seek to be). So what? Woman up. Be a woman.
The amazing Archbishop Fulton Sheen once said, "To a great extent the level of any civilization is the level of its womanhood. When a man loves a woman, he has to become worthy of her. The higher her virtue, the more her character, the more devoted she is to truth, justice, goodness, the more a man has to aspire to be worthy of her. The history of civilization could actually be written in terms of the level of its women."
How true that statement really is. All too often I hear my lady friends (and myself) bemoaning the state of men today, how they aren't what they could be, how they don't pursue us, how they don't honor and respect us. At some point, however, we need to look inside ourselves and see where the real issue is. Are we challenging men to be men, to be worthy of us? Or, are we lowering our standards (consciously or unconciously) and thereby lowering the quality of men?
We wonder why men aren't being men, but are we looking within ourselves? I can't tell you how many times a day women lower their standards and therefore its no wonder that guys act the way they do! We (and I say we because I know that I'm not perfect, try as I might!) don't hold ourselves to glory, to true beauty. We sell ourselves short. We think we aren't beautiful enough, so we plaster on the make up. Do you know what that says to a guy? It says, I don't think I'm that beautiful and I can be insecure about my looks...and the rest becomes history. Instead, how about we trust that the Lord made us exactly the way He wanted us to be and we are truly beautiful in His eyes. Song of Songs says, "You are beautiful in every way, my friend, there is no flaw in you!" (4:7). Be a woman, be beautiful.
How else do we sell ourselves short? We wear clothes that leave little, if anything, to mystery. I sound like a broken record saying this, but it is a broken record because it is true! When we, as ladies, wear clothes that isn't modest we are telling guys that we don't value ourselves enough to cover up, to be mysterious. I'm not saying you have to wear a habit everyday, but leave some mystery about you; its like reading a good book, they'll want to keep reading!
We throw oursleves at guys. God knows I've been guilty of this, and oh how embarrassing it can be to look back and see that, and to look around and see it in women. Hit up your local bar and I can just about guarantee that you'll see what I'm talking about. We have a drink or two (or maybe some of us don't even need liquid courage to do this) and we start flirting with some cute guy. But its not just playful flirting because anyone and their brother can tell how desperate we are. We flirt and we bat our pretty little mascara-covered eye-lashes, we laugh at all his silly (and often inappropriate) jokes. We become easy. We are, in essence, telling the guy that we don't have the self-respect to be pursued, so we'll just take on the role of the guy and throw ourselves at you. We aren't at peace in ourselves, so we throw ourselves at guys. We are telling them that they not only don't have to pursue us, but that we, in our desperate, often alcohol-induced state aren't seeking much more than attention, than instant gratification. Furthermore, by communicating this to guys we are, in turn, giving them permission to treat us the same way, to use us for instant gratification. Its kind of like teaching a man to fish and then telling him not to fish; monkey see, monkey do.
So what's my point in all this ranting? As easy at it can be to blame guys for failing to be men, we too have blame in this game. Until we, as women of God, as women seeking to be loved by a MAN stand up, respect ourselves, cover ourselves up and stop throwing ourselves at guys we have no right to hope that men will exist. Its a two-way street, folks. Are you walking it, or do you think you're on a one-way street? Love yourself enough to make a man want to become worthy of you, worthy of your time, of your love and affection, of your life. Stop selling yourself short of the glory and wonder that you are, that you were created to be.
I feel like I need a disclaimer: just because you "woman up" doesn't necessarily mean that men will start walking into your life, but it will make it easier to walk away from boys. This is a process, it takes time to "woman up", to really respect yourself, and likewise it takes time for guys to man up, but we have to start somewhere.
Imitate Mary, our mother, the mother of Jesus. Love yourself. Woman up.
AMEN.
The amazing Archbishop Fulton Sheen once said, "To a great extent the level of any civilization is the level of its womanhood. When a man loves a woman, he has to become worthy of her. The higher her virtue, the more her character, the more devoted she is to truth, justice, goodness, the more a man has to aspire to be worthy of her. The history of civilization could actually be written in terms of the level of its women."
How true that statement really is. All too often I hear my lady friends (and myself) bemoaning the state of men today, how they aren't what they could be, how they don't pursue us, how they don't honor and respect us. At some point, however, we need to look inside ourselves and see where the real issue is. Are we challenging men to be men, to be worthy of us? Or, are we lowering our standards (consciously or unconciously) and thereby lowering the quality of men?
We wonder why men aren't being men, but are we looking within ourselves? I can't tell you how many times a day women lower their standards and therefore its no wonder that guys act the way they do! We (and I say we because I know that I'm not perfect, try as I might!) don't hold ourselves to glory, to true beauty. We sell ourselves short. We think we aren't beautiful enough, so we plaster on the make up. Do you know what that says to a guy? It says, I don't think I'm that beautiful and I can be insecure about my looks...and the rest becomes history. Instead, how about we trust that the Lord made us exactly the way He wanted us to be and we are truly beautiful in His eyes. Song of Songs says, "You are beautiful in every way, my friend, there is no flaw in you!" (4:7). Be a woman, be beautiful.
How else do we sell ourselves short? We wear clothes that leave little, if anything, to mystery. I sound like a broken record saying this, but it is a broken record because it is true! When we, as ladies, wear clothes that isn't modest we are telling guys that we don't value ourselves enough to cover up, to be mysterious. I'm not saying you have to wear a habit everyday, but leave some mystery about you; its like reading a good book, they'll want to keep reading!
We throw oursleves at guys. God knows I've been guilty of this, and oh how embarrassing it can be to look back and see that, and to look around and see it in women. Hit up your local bar and I can just about guarantee that you'll see what I'm talking about. We have a drink or two (or maybe some of us don't even need liquid courage to do this) and we start flirting with some cute guy. But its not just playful flirting because anyone and their brother can tell how desperate we are. We flirt and we bat our pretty little mascara-covered eye-lashes, we laugh at all his silly (and often inappropriate) jokes. We become easy. We are, in essence, telling the guy that we don't have the self-respect to be pursued, so we'll just take on the role of the guy and throw ourselves at you. We aren't at peace in ourselves, so we throw ourselves at guys. We are telling them that they not only don't have to pursue us, but that we, in our desperate, often alcohol-induced state aren't seeking much more than attention, than instant gratification. Furthermore, by communicating this to guys we are, in turn, giving them permission to treat us the same way, to use us for instant gratification. Its kind of like teaching a man to fish and then telling him not to fish; monkey see, monkey do.
So what's my point in all this ranting? As easy at it can be to blame guys for failing to be men, we too have blame in this game. Until we, as women of God, as women seeking to be loved by a MAN stand up, respect ourselves, cover ourselves up and stop throwing ourselves at guys we have no right to hope that men will exist. Its a two-way street, folks. Are you walking it, or do you think you're on a one-way street? Love yourself enough to make a man want to become worthy of you, worthy of your time, of your love and affection, of your life. Stop selling yourself short of the glory and wonder that you are, that you were created to be.
I feel like I need a disclaimer: just because you "woman up" doesn't necessarily mean that men will start walking into your life, but it will make it easier to walk away from boys. This is a process, it takes time to "woman up", to really respect yourself, and likewise it takes time for guys to man up, but we have to start somewhere.
Imitate Mary, our mother, the mother of Jesus. Love yourself. Woman up.
AMEN.
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
the marriage Prayer
So perhaps I've misnamed this series. Its not always going to feature songs about waiting, but also songs that give you hope when waiting, songs that make you go, "that kind of love is worth waiting for." That being said, this week's song falls into that last category. Without further ado...the song of the week:
Artist: John Waller
Song: The Marriage Prayer
Lyrics:
Verse 1:
Father, I said till
Death do us part
I want to mean it
With all of my heart
Help me to love you
More than I love her
Then I know I can
Love her more
Than anyone else
Pre:
And bring her in
Your presence today
Make her what
You want her to be
Chorus:
I pray to hear her heart
I pray she'll love you more
I pray to cherish and serve her
And we'll bring you glory today, I pray
Verse 2 (Josee Waller):
Father, I said till
Death do us part
I want to mean it
With all of my heart
Help me to love you
More than I love him
Then I know I can
Love him more
Than anyone else
Pre:
And bring him in
Your presence today
Make him what
You want him to be
Chorus:
Bridge:
Lord, help me love her
As you love the church, your bride
(Josee) Help me submit to him
As I submit to you, my life
Chorus: (2x)
Out:
This is my prayer Amen
I love that this married couple sings this song together. Isn't that in and of itself worth waiting for?
This song continually reminds me of scripture passages - who wouldn't want a husband that not only knows scripture verses, but then sings them to you as his promise to you? (Ok, maybe an atheist wouldn't, but that's not really my area of expertise anyway...)
And how beautiful is the prayer that comes straight from their hearts (listen to the song and its basically impossible to not hear this prayer coming from the depths of their hearts) to love God more than they love the other? I don't want a husband who loves me more than anything else, I want a husband who loves God more than anything else. I only hope to be second place, and this couple has that exactly right. They know that by loving God, by allowing Him to fill them, they will be empowered to love each other more fully, more intentionally, and in a holy and pure way.
I want my husband to pray that he would hear my heart, that he would know my heart. A couple of married friends once told me that when they were dating the man would constantly go to adoration and pray to hear her heart, that he would know how to love her heart and even now that they are married, his still does this! God knows our hearts better than we do ourselves, I can only hope that my husband seeks the heart of God in order to reach my heart.
They pray that the other would love God more and isn't that what the vocation, the Sacrament of marriage is all about? As one of my priest friends often says, marriage isn't about getting your spouse to heaven, that isn't enough. You need to get them to know and fall in love with Jesus, so to have that element in this song just makes me love it even more!
And the bridge - straight out of Ephesians 5! So often guys will quote that passage out of context simply saying that women should submit to men, but if you read that whole passage it isn't a command, it is an invitation to love and to be loved.
I love Josee's prayer: and bring him in Your presence today, make him what You want him to be. How beautiful, how true is that prayer for single, engaged and married women everywhere! Lord, my future husband, where ever he may be, bring him in Your most holy presence today and every day, make him not what I want him to be, what I think I need him to be, but make him what You want him to be.
This is my prayer, AMEN.
Artist: John Waller
Song: The Marriage Prayer
Lyrics:
Verse 1:
Father, I said till
Death do us part
I want to mean it
With all of my heart
Help me to love you
More than I love her
Then I know I can
Love her more
Than anyone else
Pre:
And bring her in
Your presence today
Make her what
You want her to be
Chorus:
I pray to hear her heart
I pray she'll love you more
I pray to cherish and serve her
And we'll bring you glory today, I pray
Verse 2 (Josee Waller):
Father, I said till
Death do us part
I want to mean it
With all of my heart
Help me to love you
More than I love him
Then I know I can
Love him more
Than anyone else
Pre:
And bring him in
Your presence today
Make him what
You want him to be
Chorus:
Bridge:
Lord, help me love her
As you love the church, your bride
(Josee) Help me submit to him
As I submit to you, my life
Chorus: (2x)
Out:
This is my prayer Amen
I love that this married couple sings this song together. Isn't that in and of itself worth waiting for?
This song continually reminds me of scripture passages - who wouldn't want a husband that not only knows scripture verses, but then sings them to you as his promise to you? (Ok, maybe an atheist wouldn't, but that's not really my area of expertise anyway...)
And how beautiful is the prayer that comes straight from their hearts (listen to the song and its basically impossible to not hear this prayer coming from the depths of their hearts) to love God more than they love the other? I don't want a husband who loves me more than anything else, I want a husband who loves God more than anything else. I only hope to be second place, and this couple has that exactly right. They know that by loving God, by allowing Him to fill them, they will be empowered to love each other more fully, more intentionally, and in a holy and pure way.
I want my husband to pray that he would hear my heart, that he would know my heart. A couple of married friends once told me that when they were dating the man would constantly go to adoration and pray to hear her heart, that he would know how to love her heart and even now that they are married, his still does this! God knows our hearts better than we do ourselves, I can only hope that my husband seeks the heart of God in order to reach my heart.
They pray that the other would love God more and isn't that what the vocation, the Sacrament of marriage is all about? As one of my priest friends often says, marriage isn't about getting your spouse to heaven, that isn't enough. You need to get them to know and fall in love with Jesus, so to have that element in this song just makes me love it even more!
And the bridge - straight out of Ephesians 5! So often guys will quote that passage out of context simply saying that women should submit to men, but if you read that whole passage it isn't a command, it is an invitation to love and to be loved.
I love Josee's prayer: and bring him in Your presence today, make him what You want him to be. How beautiful, how true is that prayer for single, engaged and married women everywhere! Lord, my future husband, where ever he may be, bring him in Your most holy presence today and every day, make him not what I want him to be, what I think I need him to be, but make him what You want him to be.
This is my prayer, AMEN.
Monday, August 1, 2011
ripples or Waves?
Lately I've been reflecting on the effects that our lives can have on others. I'm struck by the people who have touched me and how different my life would be like without some of those people, good and bad. I think about my friend who first invited me to youth group and how that changed my life forever, how it brought me back to the faith, allowed me to let Jesus love me, led me to major in theology - all because one person invited me to youth group.
I think about people who have changed my life in other ways. I think about a guy I dated who showed me that love is real, that a real man will pursue me, will honor and cherish my heart, body, soul and mind. He gave me hope that real men still exist; real, honest, godly men are out there.
I think about people who have told me that I'm not worth it, that I'm not lovable. I think about people who allowed me to believe those lies, the people I partied with in college who told me that "everyone does it" and that getting drunk was normal and fun, so keep doing it. I think about how those people changed my life...and they did, but not necessarily in good ways.
You see, we all have the ability to change someone's life. It could be in a simple invitation to youth group, or it could be an invitation to have just one more drink, then another, and another. Every moment of every day we have the choice, we choose our words, our actions and we choose to affect others by the words and actions we choose for ourselves.
By our very lives we can change so many others, we can show them Jesus in our words and in our deeds. Or, we can show them the absence of His light, we can usher in doubt, confusion, frustration and disappointment in others. We can create ripples of love. If that one person hadn't invited me to youth group, I may have never really fallen in love with Jesus, I may have never majored in theology and become a youth minister and had the opportunity to witness to teens across the country (and hopefully changed their lives in someway). All of that because one person invited me.
Or, we can create waves of uneasiness. That one person in college invited me to have a drink, then have another and another until the road I was traveling on became very dark and very lonely, despite the promise of new friends. I drank and had "friends" and suddenly there were guys that wanted to hang out with me. I could have (and thanks be to God I didn't) continued down that path to my spiritual, and perhaps even my phsyical death. All of that because one person invited me.
So what are you going to do with your life? What are you doing with it right now? Are you inviting people to know Jesus? Are you creating waves of uneasiness for others, or ripples of love?
Let us love.
AMEN.
I think about people who have changed my life in other ways. I think about a guy I dated who showed me that love is real, that a real man will pursue me, will honor and cherish my heart, body, soul and mind. He gave me hope that real men still exist; real, honest, godly men are out there.
I think about people who have told me that I'm not worth it, that I'm not lovable. I think about people who allowed me to believe those lies, the people I partied with in college who told me that "everyone does it" and that getting drunk was normal and fun, so keep doing it. I think about how those people changed my life...and they did, but not necessarily in good ways.
You see, we all have the ability to change someone's life. It could be in a simple invitation to youth group, or it could be an invitation to have just one more drink, then another, and another. Every moment of every day we have the choice, we choose our words, our actions and we choose to affect others by the words and actions we choose for ourselves.
By our very lives we can change so many others, we can show them Jesus in our words and in our deeds. Or, we can show them the absence of His light, we can usher in doubt, confusion, frustration and disappointment in others. We can create ripples of love. If that one person hadn't invited me to youth group, I may have never really fallen in love with Jesus, I may have never majored in theology and become a youth minister and had the opportunity to witness to teens across the country (and hopefully changed their lives in someway). All of that because one person invited me.
Or, we can create waves of uneasiness. That one person in college invited me to have a drink, then have another and another until the road I was traveling on became very dark and very lonely, despite the promise of new friends. I drank and had "friends" and suddenly there were guys that wanted to hang out with me. I could have (and thanks be to God I didn't) continued down that path to my spiritual, and perhaps even my phsyical death. All of that because one person invited me.
So what are you going to do with your life? What are you doing with it right now? Are you inviting people to know Jesus? Are you creating waves of uneasiness for others, or ripples of love?
Let us love.
AMEN.
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